Jack of all trades, master of none

Some of you probably hear me bring up past accomplishments, activities, etc. It has been so weird for me to lose some of my talents that set myself apart from others. Yes, I have always been good in a number of areas, music, sports, arts, decorating, etc. But now, I honestly can't say there is anything I am a master of. This is not to build me up in anyway, instead it is to motivate myself and see if any of you have found the balance in growing up and leaving some things behind. I need to decide what I want to cultivate in my life and continue to learn and grow in. Here are some talents that have changed in my life:

Piano- I started playing piano when I was 5. I took lessons until I was 12 and then accompianied choirs in my hometown. I was a great sightreader and people knew that I was a great pianist. Now, there are probably 10 people who even know I play/ed the piano. I sit down and play every once in a while and become greatly discouraged because I am back to the same place I was when I was 8 or 9. One of my goals is to take improv piano lessons and to reteach myself piano theory. I have said I will do this when I graduate from college. Is this something I should cultivate?

Running- I also started running in elementary school. I was the girl that the boys hated getting beat by in the mile run in PE. I had great success, school record holder, state competitor, ran in college, etc. Now I am just a morning running, which I do love, but I know I could do better. I could run races, I could improve and be more fit. Is this something I should cultivate?

Athletisism- I used to be able to jump into any game and be a contributing member of the team. Now, I find myself making silly noises when I miss the ball or have to move quickly. The competitiveness has left me. Besides running, I have digressed in my ability to be athletic. Is this something I should cultivate?

There are more, but I want to hear from some of you. Where is the balance? I don't know what to be okay with and what to push myself in. I don't know if this makes sense to anyone, please let me know what you think. Keep in mind my last post was all about slowing down...irony???

No real rhyme or reason...

Slow down...that's what everyone has been telling me. For some people, they tell me to slow down and minutes later ask me to do this or that. For one, it is a plea to have a wife who doesn't spend hours in tears due to stress. For others, it is the longing to see their daughter/daughter-in-law enjoy her days as a young 21 year old with her entire life ahead of her. So why haven't I slowed down?

I don't know why I feel the need to do so much or accomplish so much. I have always been crazy busy, but usually it all turns out okay in the end. Until now. I recently sat for a 7 hour test to be investment licensed. I put in countless hours preparing, yet I failed. I wasn't overly confident going into the test, I actually cried for about an hour the night before I took it because I felt unprepared. Everyone around me assured me I would be alright. After taking the test and seeing FAIL appear on the screen, I cried on the drive back to Nampa. I told myself I would not cry about it at work, the guys don't walk into the office in tears if they fail, so neither would I. It's like Reba sings "cowgirls don't cry." Anyway, in the days following I know that failing that test is not like me, and that was one of the first tell tail signs that I am overdoing it. Also, I am trying to say "I didn't pass" instead of "failed" because it is more positive. :-)

Although I am going going going, full time student, full time employee, full time wife, the progress in school gets further out with each semester. This is to no one's fault. I transferred from NNU to BSU and lost some credits, but my level of happiness at BSU was greatly worth the lost credits. I took 15 credits last semester while working full time, which I swore I would never do again. Then, the other night I was looking at my remaining classes and realized I would have to take 15 credits again in order to graduate when I wanted. So I decided I would do it. This is where my dear husband piped in, and co-workers, and dad, and mom, etc. I don't have to tell you what they said, you already know, you are probably wanting to tell me the same thing. So, I am slowing down. I won't gradute until December of 2010, but at least I will remember these years of my life and have great memories of doing other things besides stressing out. So hopefully, you will see me more, and I will have something to talk about besides school.

Anyway, I am putting it out there. I am slowing down. Now you know and you will hold me to it. So it may take me as long to finish my undergrad as it does a doctor to finish med school. At the end of the day, I am 21, I am young. I need to remember this, there is no rush, slow down!

Fun and Satisfying things to do that don't cost money!

I am just coming up with these, but I hope someone has some fun with them!

1. Rearrange the furniture/decor in your house.
2. Create a new recipe with food in your house.
3. Start a blog.
4. Go to the library and get a book.
5. Practice taking cool/abstract photos.
6. Polish any wood furniture that you have.
7. Watch a movie.
8. What a TV series online, this is one of my favorites.
9. Wash all of the odd things in your house like blankets, rugs, etc.
10. Organize the drawers in your kitchen/bathroom.
11. Bake cookies and have a nephew, niece, friend come over to frost them.
12. Go through your files and get rid of anything you don't need...can you tell I like to organize.
13. Scrapbook.
14. Play board games or card games with your husband/wife.
15. Call a friend to go on a walk to catch up instead of sitting on your butt while you catch up.
16. Go running.
17. Work out at home doing push-ups, sit-ups, wall sits, etc.
18. Try new styles with your hair on a lazy saturday so you can do them later.
19. Give yourself and pedi and mani.
20. Have friends over for dinner, I need to do this more.

Alright, this is one of my breaks from studying. I am taking a huge test on Monday the 23rd...I believe it is 6 hours long and has a 40% passing rate. Wish me luck....a pray hard!

A day early...

First of all. I must brag on my husband for a minute, he worked 76 hours this week. Yes, this week, most of us hardly work that in two weeks. What a guy!

Since he has been working so much, our schedules haven't matched up at all lately. I miss him terribly, and after sitting around feeling sorry for myself on Friday night, I kicked it into high gear and decided to get my part of valentine's day ready for him a day early. So I prepared a wonderful dinner, made a heart shaped cookie and served it to him on the "You are special today" plate, gave him and card and sweet tart hearts, and continued my tradition of valentine's lingerie purchased from walmart. So when he came home, there was his wife, in valentine's lingerie and an apron, cooking away. To which he had to chuckle.

He was such a good sport as I asked him to take pictures to document every aspect of our early valentine's day. Can you tell in one of the pictures he thought it was cute to hide behind me, seriously, having 12 year old boys is going to be a snap for me. Sometimes he reverts back to that age, and to be honest it usually makes me laugh, which only encourages the behavior.

I want to give you a glimpse of this. Tyler is so good at mocking me, which is good, because as many of you know I take myself too seriously sometimes. So during dinner I asked him if it was good (it was a new recipe), and he simply said "yeah, it's really good." So I asked him to tell me about it. In response he laughed at me and broke into an opera song proclaiming, "It is so good, I want to tell the whole world, make it every night, etc." Honestly, I just wanted some constructive criticism. Regardless, I laughed and laughed.

I am so thankful to have a man that makes me laugh. What a blessing! I have to remind myself that he makes me laugh while I am in tears for some comment or something "boyish" that he did. Anyway, we finished off the night watching season three of heroes. He is at work again tonight (Valentine's day) but he will be home soon. The greatest part, tomorrow is two years since he proposed to me. We are heading to the Cheesecake Factory for some quality eats and treats. I hope you all had a wonderful Valentine's day!

Where the magic happens! :-)

Here are some pictures of our bedroom, I love it. It was the first room I did when we moved in and I had the design in mind for quite a while. It will change a little bit at the end of the month, with some new furniture pieces. Anyway, Tyler has been gone for 10 days and comes home tomorrow night. We have a black tie awards banquet for my work, should be a ton of fun. Tyler is wearing a tux and I am wearing a floor lenth formal. I'll be sure to take some pictures to update y'all. Anyway, have a happy weekend!

What a friend!

Ashley Puga, for those of you who know her, wow! You are blessed! I am so thankful for her special friendship. I spent last Saturday with her, treating her to a birthday surprise. She was told to dress up a little and be ready by 6:00. Much to her surprise, I showed up with a cute little poem that clued her in to what the night had ahead. We started out at Brick 29, an amazing restaurant. We had calamari, a salmon entree, and bread pudding and creme broule for dessert. Amazing! Then we headed to her house to snap a quick picture before we headed to Walmart. Yes, Walmart for her birthday. It was so great, we each had $12 to create a frame for the picture of us. We both got creative! Then we headed to see "New In Town" which we both enjoyed. Anyway, I am so grateful for Ashley. She listens, and pokes and prods, and hugs, and laughs, and all the things girls need a friend to do. I am so excited for this next year for her and all it holds. I hope you all have a friend like Ashley.

Studio D

I am so happy with my new hair cut and color. I have been ranting and raving about Megan at Studio D. She does such a great job and makes the whole experience so fun. Studio D is an amazing salon, it is in Nampa. If you live in Boise, Studio D is worth the Drive. I have never enjoyed the "salon experience" before, but now I am hooked! If you want to check out Megan's skills at Studio D let me know and I'll give you a referral card for $10 off! You will love Megan and your new look!

P.S. --My page background and our bedroom look a lot alike!

Sew...a needle pulling thread

While my mom is an amazing seamstress, I have come to the realization that I don' t have a clue how to sew. Sure, she tried to teach me, but I wanted my stuff to look good so I would usually have to do it all. Whoops! A couple of weeks ago I tried to hem a curtain for the office at work. What a chore, getting the machine threaded was a headache in itself, not to mention my thread kept breaking once I was sewing. After some frustration and seven calls to my mom, the curtain is hemmed. It was not an enjoyable!

I have decided that my little girls will not leave for college without knowing how to sew. I felt so incompetant, so this is what I am doing. I am going to teach myself to sew. I picked a bag pattern and some great fabric, so slowly but surely I am working on the bag. I've already made some mistakes, but that is the fun of it. I am hoping to find someone that lives near me that can teach me more after I get done with the bag. When I finish the bag, I'll post a picture...it could be a while!

Special times!

Yikes...that last blog entry was a marathon. Sorry about that! Tonight, after a long day at work, I am very thankful for friends and my husband. During lunch I texted Jessie to see if I could hang out tonight because after a day like today, I didn't want to be alone all evening while Tyler is working. Not only did she said I could come hang out, but she made me dinner and her husband bought us wine to help my evening finish well. It was so nice to have a place to go where I am surrounded by good friends. I have really been blessed by Jessie, she is my running partner and we have so much fun being honest and sharing our confrontational viewpoints. Haha!

I am also thankful that my boss is letting me go in late tomorrow for the sole perpous of sleeping in with my husband. Tyler has been working nights and he is working nights this weekend so the extra hour in the morning together will be amazing! Yay!

Christmas 2008

We had a great Christmas...four times! If you make it to the end of this blog you'll hear how my heart handled Christmas this year.

On Tuesday, the 23rd, we drove to Dallas, Oregon to spend Christmas with my mom and Nels. Tuesday was a rough day of travel, due to the winter storm, and we ended up staying in Gresham for the night to catch the BSU game and relax. The skid plate on the 4runner also was bent so we couldn't go any further until we removed it. We had fun at the hotel, walking to Burger King, watching the game (although BSU lost...grr), and just relaxing. We woke up Wednesday morning and Tyler went to the 4runner and laid in the snow to take the skid plate off...what a guy! We spent a few days with my mom and Nels were we did Christmas Eve and Christmas morning with Nels' kids and Christmas with my mom's side of the family. It was really a lot of fun! My new brothers and sisters are so nice and my new nieces and nephews are adorable and very funny! Time with my mom's side of the family was fun, there are new babies and they are too cute. Everyone is doing pretty well, and we all enjoyed our time together.

On Saturday Tyler and I headed up to Lake Oswego to spend some time with my dad and his wife, Susan. Yes, you read correctly, I spent time at my dad's house. WHAT A BLESSING! Being about to spend time with both my mom and dad was wonderful. It is the first time I have been able to do this and I look forward to doing it from now on. I am so thankful to have my dad in my life again, every girl needs a dad! They took us to a really nice dinner, it was a very nice time!

On Tuesday, December 30th, Tyler and I did our Christmas together. It was so fun! He did an amazing job with my presents, especially my stocking. I would have picked everything that he put in there...it was such a treat! It was so nice to spend time just the two of us. I am so thankful for Tyler and the wisdom and levelheadedness he brings to some of the chaotic moments in my life.

On New Year's Eve and New Years we did Christmas Eve and Christmas with Tyler's family. His brother flew out from South Carolina and we spent most nights that week staying up late watching movies, playing games, etc. I lost at Monopoly and Yahtzee...which doesn't happen very often! We had a wonderful Christmas dinner and spent over an hour opening gifts and stockings. We went sledding up on the mountain with his family also, which is always a good time.

If you are still reading, here is the part I have really been looking forward to sharing with you. The holidays are always a weird time of year for me. While I look forward to going home and seeing family it isn't the feeling of utter joy. In the past I have had a lot of painful holidays and there is still uncertainty weather "this year" will be a dramatic year or not. Luckily, this year was not. That was such a blessing. At the same time, it was fairly emotional for me. I really noticed that I long for stability during the holidays. I have had so many holidays without traditions or with some traditions ending. I shared with Tyler my longing for stability, and he understood. He was so helpful in coming up with ways we can create traditions and give our children the joy of the holidays that Tyler grew up with and still enjoys with his family. I am not saying that my family isn't a good time, but I am noticing the effects of not having both parents, together, to share the holidays with. I am really looking forward to creating traditions with Tyler. I am amazed at his understanding for my feelings. I have really been affected by my family's past more now than I thought I would. I can't imagine working through these feelings without the Lord, and I am so thankful that He has given me a Godly man to be here with me.

I hope that you all enjoyed your holidays and that you created traditions of your own. I have been thinking of all of you lately and I hope you are blessed in 2009. I am so excited for 2009...it is the first year that I will have my truly joyful spirit year-round. Yay!