Some random pictures

Here are some random pictures I found in my email.

Tyler and Macey in Sun Valley for the 4th of July 2008!

Macey holding her cousin, Simon, June 2008. Not going to lie, I have a little baby fever right now, but not enough to do anything about it!

A little modeling promo from a quick trip to Portland. Kate is in Europe right now I think, great girl.

Jack of all trades, master of none

Some of you probably hear me bring up past accomplishments, activities, etc. It has been so weird for me to lose some of my talents that set myself apart from others. Yes, I have always been good in a number of areas, music, sports, arts, decorating, etc. But now, I honestly can't say there is anything I am a master of. This is not to build me up in anyway, instead it is to motivate myself and see if any of you have found the balance in growing up and leaving some things behind. I need to decide what I want to cultivate in my life and continue to learn and grow in. Here are some talents that have changed in my life:

Piano- I started playing piano when I was 5. I took lessons until I was 12 and then accompianied choirs in my hometown. I was a great sightreader and people knew that I was a great pianist. Now, there are probably 10 people who even know I play/ed the piano. I sit down and play every once in a while and become greatly discouraged because I am back to the same place I was when I was 8 or 9. One of my goals is to take improv piano lessons and to reteach myself piano theory. I have said I will do this when I graduate from college. Is this something I should cultivate?

Running- I also started running in elementary school. I was the girl that the boys hated getting beat by in the mile run in PE. I had great success, school record holder, state competitor, ran in college, etc. Now I am just a morning running, which I do love, but I know I could do better. I could run races, I could improve and be more fit. Is this something I should cultivate?

Athletisism- I used to be able to jump into any game and be a contributing member of the team. Now, I find myself making silly noises when I miss the ball or have to move quickly. The competitiveness has left me. Besides running, I have digressed in my ability to be athletic. Is this something I should cultivate?

There are more, but I want to hear from some of you. Where is the balance? I don't know what to be okay with and what to push myself in. I don't know if this makes sense to anyone, please let me know what you think. Keep in mind my last post was all about slowing down...irony???

No real rhyme or reason...

Slow down...that's what everyone has been telling me. For some people, they tell me to slow down and minutes later ask me to do this or that. For one, it is a plea to have a wife who doesn't spend hours in tears due to stress. For others, it is the longing to see their daughter/daughter-in-law enjoy her days as a young 21 year old with her entire life ahead of her. So why haven't I slowed down?

I don't know why I feel the need to do so much or accomplish so much. I have always been crazy busy, but usually it all turns out okay in the end. Until now. I recently sat for a 7 hour test to be investment licensed. I put in countless hours preparing, yet I failed. I wasn't overly confident going into the test, I actually cried for about an hour the night before I took it because I felt unprepared. Everyone around me assured me I would be alright. After taking the test and seeing FAIL appear on the screen, I cried on the drive back to Nampa. I told myself I would not cry about it at work, the guys don't walk into the office in tears if they fail, so neither would I. It's like Reba sings "cowgirls don't cry." Anyway, in the days following I know that failing that test is not like me, and that was one of the first tell tail signs that I am overdoing it. Also, I am trying to say "I didn't pass" instead of "failed" because it is more positive. :-)

Although I am going going going, full time student, full time employee, full time wife, the progress in school gets further out with each semester. This is to no one's fault. I transferred from NNU to BSU and lost some credits, but my level of happiness at BSU was greatly worth the lost credits. I took 15 credits last semester while working full time, which I swore I would never do again. Then, the other night I was looking at my remaining classes and realized I would have to take 15 credits again in order to graduate when I wanted. So I decided I would do it. This is where my dear husband piped in, and co-workers, and dad, and mom, etc. I don't have to tell you what they said, you already know, you are probably wanting to tell me the same thing. So, I am slowing down. I won't gradute until December of 2010, but at least I will remember these years of my life and have great memories of doing other things besides stressing out. So hopefully, you will see me more, and I will have something to talk about besides school.

Anyway, I am putting it out there. I am slowing down. Now you know and you will hold me to it. So it may take me as long to finish my undergrad as it does a doctor to finish med school. At the end of the day, I am 21, I am young. I need to remember this, there is no rush, slow down!